Saturday, July 07, 2007

Live Earth Day!!!!

Woo hoo! After today, there will be no more Global Warming. Al Gore and the Goracles are going to rock away the heat baby! 7 continents and a billion people rocking out. What more could Gaia ask for? This is a brilliant plan. An entire day of non-stop private jets flying around the country, massive stage sets gobbling electricity and a billion people with their TV's, stereos and radios all cranked up using the evil electric juice that these stars hate so much.

If you are feeling the tofu inspired love, you can help the cause here. Make a donation...get a t-shirt! What could be better? This is the shirt I bought, can't wait for it to get here so I can fit in with the eco-nazi's.
My suggestion for the Goracle, you might want to start small chief. Clean up your own life, be a bit of a parent, get your kid on track. Then, well you know, gradually increase. Demolish your house and live in a zero-energy using house, ride a bike everywhere (exercise would be good for you bud) and lead by example. The "do as I say" attitude you and your acolytes preach ain't gonna go down well with the American public. I'm sure the Europeans love it, and the rock-stars and Hollywood types are always on the lookout for the next great Religion (yes Al, you are the new L. Ron Hubbard) but normal, common-sense Americans would tell you to stick your hypocritical sermons up your compost heap.

If you'll excuse me, I'm going outside to feed some cows some beano, light some tire and garbage fires, and spray some aerosol cans in the air. But don't worry, I'll be listening to Live Earth on the XM, so I'll be saving the Earth, one terrible terrible song at a time.

Arctic Monkeys Rule!!